Friday, November 18, 2011

Submitting fully and asking for more

I don't know...does anyone really want a blow by blow? I am going to write it anyway...if for nothing else than to save it for us. I really, I KNOW tonight was a turning point for us.

Per my instructions; I went upstairs and and took off my clothes, except my panties. I put a vibrator, that he had left out on the bed, against my cunt....and I wait...and I waited...and I waited...I could feel myself getting irritated . I kept telling myself, 'submit, submit...HIS pleasure'.

When I finally heard his footfalls on the top of the landing, I felt my entire body melt. He came in and warmed his hands on the small space heater. With such attention to detail as this, is it any wonder I love him so. He ran his warmed hands across my body and man handled my big tits. Spanked my ass and squeezed my nipples.

He went into the bathroom and motioned me to follow. He pulled a tight tank over my head, he had modified the tank. He had cut out holes in the tank for my boobs to hang out and then cut small slits around the boob holes and threaded shoe laces through the slits. He had me lean over a chair, so my big tits hung down and then he pulled the laces tight, binding my tits tight. This is normally something I would bristle at. I would comply, but it would be immediately obvious that this is not something in my 'do me' script or desires. When it was clear that I was more open and ready to accept his direction for his pleasure, the power shift was clear.

G ordered me to lay back down on the bed and as he went to his stash of toys, his excitement was glaring. He went back and forth: he tortured my tits and nipples, with rough squeezes and pulling, twisting and biting, then put on nipple clamps...only to take them off and whip my tits and nipples with the crop, then put the clamps back on...only to take them off again moments later to pinch them and squeeze them again.

He choose one of the largest dildos we have...I swear to test me (because I have an aversion to dildos in my pussy) and made me fuck myself with it. I let go and did it and then when he ordered me to suck it, I did. He choose a large butt plug and lubed my ass up and inserted it. Working it in deeper and deeper. Now, I love our normal 'smooshy' plug, but this one was hard and unyielding and no doubt, more pain than pleasure. Not done, testing me...he grabbed my panties he had pulled off and put them over my head, inserting the crotch area across my mouth as a gag...then finally satisfied, he plunged his cock in my pussy. His thrusts were almost brutal and honestly, a bit painful. After fucking me until I was almost ready to say stop, he pulled out and pushed the panties aside and told me, "open your mouth, whore," and shoved his cock into my mouth and deep down my throat. He fucked my mouth until he came, his big hot load squirting in my mouth and spilling out across my face.

It was clear that I didn't cum and it was clear that was more than OK with him...and I can't believe I am saying this...was actually good for me.

After, I debated internally whether to say anything or not. It was clear we were headed in that direction already...but I decided, what the hell...say what is on your mind, clear communication is always a good thing...funny how after 19 years of marriage, you can still be nervous to say some things. I told him everything I just wrote about, not more than a few hours ago...he was ecstatic. We set a safeword and talked a bit about what helps me focus (more verbal), but I also said, I want to and am working on not needing that, since that doesn't come easily to him. Also, I asked for more direction in regards to hair, make up and preparations.

In the end, we are both on cloud nine right now. I am so happy and excited...and could it be better timing? I am so looking forward to this weekend.

Thanks to all those who have provided information and their stories; it really has made a difference in us moving forward, or at least trying to.

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Blogger Conina said...

The needing more verbal to focus I can definitely identify with - I don't know if that's something you should try to do without though.

Here's a post I did on my husband's verbosity during sex.

I can do without the talking, but if I do then I am creating a dialogue in my head in order to turn myself on... and that puts us in two different places when we're supposed to be together in one.

Just a thought.

8:55 AM  
Blogger Florida Dom said...

Congrats on reaching a turning point. You described it very well. I hope you continue to enjoy the journey. And thanks for becomng one of my followers.


12:26 PM  
Blogger littleOne said...

all I can say...lucky you. Thanks for your visit to my blog, welcome

2:17 PM  

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